With Trial and Error

After dealing with the loss of my grandmother I saw how cruel life can be by removing any bit of independence she once had.

I hit some major lows.

I loved my grandma, she was amazing, she was sassy and she was mean when she needed to be. She taught me how to cook and always let me do her hair and makeup.

It was hard. Right after I had my hip injury she broke her hip...the surgery I was avoiding and fearful of was the one thing she had to have done. And she broke her hip while staying with me. After many months of rehab she was able to return home as she wished. A few years later on a warm day she had a stroke, which was followed by many more almost 2 years after the first.

It was hard. It was hard to watch. It was hard for her, it was hard for everyone. But on a positive note in the end she did get to see exactly how much we all really loved her.

So let's just say I slumped into a I do NOT care mode for a bit here.

I still was low carb, gluten free and organic on days I tried....but the problem was I didn't try each day. I drank, I carbbed up, I ate gluten, I ate sugar, I loved my mai tais. This went on for a few months this past summer. What I was eating was only one piece of this puzzle....it was what was going on in my mind that held all the answers.

I began getting anxious over everything....I couldn't stand the reflection looking back at me...if I saw myself I would quickly look away or down at the floor. I thought everyone I was going to encounter was out to get me....in the sense that everyone was judging me. But all these thoughts that led to my emotions were all starting from MY thoughts.

I began to bloat out a bit in my body. Of course this made me feel even worse than I already was feeling. But I was self-sabotaging myself.

Now, I have gotten back on a good path, I am positive again (even when I don't want to be), fake it till you make it right!

I'd like to say yoga has been my first step I took back towards loving myself again. Seeing the small changes happen tapped me back into ME. I was so proud of myself. Finally.

So with trial and error I experienced some horrible lows that now led me to my continual progression up.

Here's my food intake now:

I am low carb, gluten free and organic 95% of the time. Call it Keto, call it Paleo...I just call it real food for what the body craves.

Life happens, oops happens, we cannot let fear take over. Just trust your body, know your body does what it does for you...love it back...don't fight it. And if you're out and eat something not ideal WHO CARES...just do your best in that moment. And after that let it go.

Don't let your mind hinder your progress to happiness and self-love.

Here's a normal looking day for me:

1 1/2 tsp pink Himalayan sea salt shot
2 large glasses water
3 organic chicken sausages/meatballs
Blended Green tea:
2 matcha green tea bags in 2 cups hot water
7 drops orgainc liquid stevia
1 TBSP organic coconut oil
3 TBSP organic heavy cream
1/2 cup organic vanilla almond milk
My daily vitamins
Leftover dinner for lunch
Dinner (protein and veggie)
Dessert Cookies/cheesecake/milkshake with heavy cream and vanilla almond milk
Yogi Tea
Nighttime pills with magnesium and 5htp

And there you have it.

Just know that in life there are lows and there are highs....but without the lows we would never appreciate the highs. Just go with the flow of life and do your best.

Allow your trial and errors to happen too.

Until Next Time...